fun from the clearance isle

A friend of mine had warned me that once you start the whole spanking thing, you cannot help but to see things from a different perspective. I didn't realize how true that was until I was standing in the clearance isle of our local department store yesterday. Anytime I go shopping I take a walk down to see what kind of values there might be. One of the things that caught my attention were these sets of bamboo cooking utensils.  It consisted of a large round spoon, a large slotted spoon, and a spatula with a hole in the middle. Was I thinking about cooking when I picked them up to look at them?  No, of course not.  I found myself thinking, "I bet Steve would love to spank my behind with these."  Since it was only $2, I decided to throw it in the cart. "I must be crazy, I already hate that stupid wooden spoon he uses now," I thought, but they stayed in the cart. I was almost giddy with joy when I came across a package of ping pong paddles that were a buck because one of them were damaged beyond repair.  I guess the retailer figured what would someone do with one ping pong paddle - clearly he is not into spanking. I finished the rest of my regular shopping and headed to the checkout line.  As the bamboo utensils and ping pong paddle took their turn being scanned, I once more thought to myself, "I really must be crazy, because I can't wait to have him try these out."  When I got home I pulled Steve into the bedroom to show him my finds.  "Oh yeh, I like this larger spoon, it's got a nice thick handle."  Man, I have done it now.  "Hmmm, this ping pong paddle should be interesting."  He grabbed my arm and spun me sideways and planted two hard whacks on each cheek.  "Yeh, that stings, but I have my jeans on. I hope your not planning on swinging that hard on my bare bottom."  "We'll see."  Good grief.  We haven't had the opportunity to try them out yet because we have company, but I'm hoping....I think.....to try them out tonight.  I have a feeling I will stay out of the clearance isle for awhile after he's done. ;)