This is the journey of one control freak wife and one gentle spirited husband as they seek to balance their

roles in their home
and bring an extra measure of joy to their already happy marriage.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

the strange and unusual

There were things that I expected from Steve on this journey, but one has surprised me completely.... his quest to find new, strange, and unusual things to spank me with.  

No, I'm not talking about just new kinds of paddles or straps.  He checks out anything long and thin, or anything with any kind of flat surface to see if it has spanking potential. 

He's taken a 12" hot glue gun stick to my behind. That stung. Then there was the dog leash. That was a flop (literally and figuratively). The most recent was my keychain.  I have two long strands of pony beads on my keychain that one of my daughter's had strung for me at camp.  He disconnected it from my main ring and spanked me with it.  I didn't like it, not one little bit.  Who would think such small things could hurt so much?!  

Anyway, I think it is time for me to do some more implement shopping.  I'm hoping it will give him something new and curb this obsession with household items.  I know he is interested in a lexan paddle with holes.  I think it would make a nice father's day gift from me to him.  

Funny that three months ago I had to practically twist his arm to try this and now he's the one venturing for new territory.  Go figure. 

Friday, May 13, 2011

stupid tv

Stupid tv!  I rarely watch it these days, but last night I decided to watch a show on-demand that I hadn't seen in a while.  I watched my show, gave the troop goodnight kisses, and headed over to the office to take care of some paperwork.

Forty-five minutes had passed, and I was putting away the last file when Steve walked in the door with implement box in hand.  I'm sure the look on my face was comical.

"Ummm, I was just getting ready to head back home."  "Good, I'm just in time then.  We can talk about some things before we go back."

"Talk about some things?"  "Yes, but strip down and get your cushion so you can kneel in front of the chair."     

Let me just say that I had a lump in my throat at that point.  It has been weeks since we have had a serious formal punishment session, and it was clear that was exactly what was about to happen.

"We need to add a new rule.  I know you don't watch tv very often, but when you do you get absorbed to the exclusion of everything else.  From now on if one of the children are trying to talk to you, you need to pause the tv and give them your full attention.  Your daughter was trying to tell you about her softball game this evening and you didn't give her any attention.  You know that right now we need to seize every opportunity to give her positive attention to counter-balance all the discipline we've had to dole out lately. Right?"    I nodded because I was too ashamed to speak. "Please go stand in the corner and think about it.  I'll be back in a few minutes."

I started crying while I was standing in the corner, and every parent who reads this will know why.  Steve returned about five minutes later and had me resume my position on my knees in front of him in the chair.

"I really didn't like it, and I think it deserves punishment even though it was not a formal rule yet. How do you feel about it?"    "Embarrassed and ashamed...I think you are absolutely right, and I'm not going to be able to forgive myself and move on until I receive punishment for it and apologize to her in the morning. Thank you for noticing it and calling me on it.  I don't want to do that again."  

"I know how much you love our children. Let's get this over with so that we can move on." 

I was paddled, strapped, and caned.  I actually have a few marks left today, but it was what was needed and deserved.  Keep in mind, I know that was not the first time that has happened, just the first time since we started dd.  I was very proud of Steve for stepping up as HoH and pointing out a behavior that was detrimental to my relationship with my children.  If we had not started dd, he might have said something eventually, but I can guarantee you that I would have become defensive and argumentative about it.  I love our new life.

And I hate that stupid tv!


"What's wrong?"    "What do you mean?"  
"You have been very withdrawn the last couple of days, and today you have been really snippy.  Are you feeling ok?"    "Yeh, I'm fine. I have a lot on my mind.  I'm sorry if I've been snippy."

"It's ok.  Sometimes you need to be able to let it out.  I'd rather you let it out on me than on someone else.  It doesn't bother me."   "I know it doesn't, which is one of the things I love about you.  I really don't want you to be my verbal punching bag though.  I think sometimes when I am pushing you, it's because I'm wanting you to push back."

"Wait a minute.  This is because you haven't had a real thorough spanking in a while, isn't it?"    "Probably.  I'm missing the structure, but I'm not upset with you at all.  It is just the way it has had to be recently.  I'm annoyed with myself for being a grouch."

"Well, if you need the grouchiness spanked out of you, then get over here and we'll take care of it right now."    "Right now?"  "Right now!"

I got a thorough hand spanking, ten medium and ten hard strokes of the cane, twenty strokes of the lexan paddle, he had me count out forty strokes of the strap, and a follow-up hand spanking.  I cried from the beginning because I had so much pent up emotion.  It also hurt like crazy because it had been a while for that type of spanking.  I feel worlds better though.  Like a hundred pounds of bricks have been lifted off my shoulders.  I feel like I could tackle the world.  That seems crazy to me, but that's the way I feel...empowered.    

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

when maintenance isn't enough

Out of sorts.  That is how I feel.  

Even though we have been able to manage squeezing in maintenance during our chaos, I am missing the structure that we had developed.  

Keeping up with the health rules would not have been practical during the past couple of weeks, but that is not to say that some of the other rules didn't get violated frequently.  

I know the reason Steve didn't enforce them is because it has been an incredibly stressful time. It just wouldn't have been a reasonable expectation for either of us.  I still miss it though.  Now that things have settled down, I'm just hoping we haven't lost too much ground.   

I need a good butt whoopin'! Know what I mean?

Saturday, May 7, 2011

still kicking

Wow, the last two weeks have been something else!  I know you guys probably thought I had fallen of the face of the planet.  With G being gone and a lot of stuff going on at the business, it has simply been non-stop! 

We have managed to fit in maintenance three or four times a week, right before we fell exhausted into the bed and fell asleep.  Sometimes I have wanted it.... sometimes I haven't, but he did it anyway knowing that it was what I needed. We haven't had any punishment spankings mostly because we had set aside most of the rules during the last two weeks.  There was just too much to deal with.

Hopefully, life will get a little more sane over the next couple of weeks.  I have enjoyed catching up on everyone's blogs and look forward to getting back into the swing of things. I bet Steve is ready to get back into the "swing of things" too! ;)