There has been a lot of discussion in the blogs lately about sex and spanking and how much they are interrelated.
When Steve and I first began this journey, I had no idea how all the elements of sex, spanking, and marriage would fit together. I had expected puzzle pieces that would fit together neatly, but in reality, for us at least, it is like a tightly inter-woven tapestry.
Love, trust, commitment, pain, sexual excitement, submission, partnership, dominance, and intimacy in a multicolored display that makes it difficult to know when one ends and another begins. It defies the capacity of logic.
At the beginning of the journey I believed that if sex and spanking were to be intermixed, it would occur with play spanking and maintenance spanking. We were surprised that as this has developed, we were finding that it is during and after punishment spankings that we are most sexually in tune with one another. We feel an intense connection. For us, I think that punishment spankings have become the moment when all the elements I mentioned above converge.
Does that mean I want punishment spankings all the time? No, only when I've earned it. That I believe is part of the magic. Those moments are what brings special elements of color to our marriage tapestry. Too much and the colors would become garish and overwhelming, too little and it would be drab and boring. I think Steve and I have been weaving a beautiful tapestry for the last fifteen years and these extra bits of color that we have added recently have made it priceless.
It is unfortunate as a society that we have so devalued and cheapened the elements of sex, intimacy, and marriage. We compartmentalize sex from marriage and even send constant media messages that say that marriage is the death of fulfilling sex and intimacy.
I genuinely grieve for those that do not get to experience marriage in its full glory, and I think those of us who are in great marriages have a responsibility to express just how wonderful marriage really is. Is marriage easy? Absolutely not! It is, however, the most beautiful relationship when it is nurtured and treasured.
It is my prayer this evening for everyone out there that if you are married, or at some point in the future choose marriage, that you will be able to look at it and see beautiful artistry in the tapestries that you are creating.